Too Much Think!

In my last blog post (I Love the Smell of Chlorine in the Morning), I referenced my new Korean friend Kim, a 60-something avid swimmer I met during my mornings at the pool who has taken a shine to me, and I to her.

There is a significant language barrier between us, but we make do with a lingo that presents as part words, part acting out what we are trying to say. She is sometimes sad, sometimes funny, sometimes wise in her comments. I like watching her try to figure out what she wants to share with me - the feelings flutter across her face like the play of light on water.

Today, I told her that I was tired, and she said, "Why?" I said I don't sleep well, and mimed sleep, then wake, then sleep and wake again. She thought for a minute, and then laughed and said, "Oh, Nita, you too much think! That's it! Too much think!"

She's absolutely right. Even more than insomnia, "too much think" has plagued me my entire life. I analyze, and examine my analysis, and parse out conversations, and ponder why some people behave and process the way they do. I map out my own actions and develop a Plan A, B, C and sometimes D, just to be sure I'm covering all the bases. And yes, I'm one of those people who always thought themselves to be impulsive. It took four personality tests to show me that I was not the carefree imp I imagined: I am far more careful than spontaneous. I need to consider all the possibilities. Yes - yikes - I am one of those!

A friend close to my heart has told me I miss a precious moment here and there because I don't simply "enjoy the now:" I have to figure it out, and then decide if it's okay to savor it. On the other hand, "too much think" makes me a good writer and communicator. It makes me deeply observant, creative, sensitive and intuitive. I'm a more treasured and thoughtful colleague, daughter, sister, girlfriend, cousin, client and service provider, thanks to "too much think."

Oh, and a better blogger. Or not. You know, maybe I need to think about that a little more before I make that claim...


© 2013 A Bit of Brie/Anitabrie