You're Not the Boss of Me! (Or Are You...?)

October 16th was National Boss's Day - at least it was in the United States and Canada (and Wikipedia says that Lithuania and Romania are in on the celebration, too). We can thank Patricia Bays Haroski for making this day a tradition. (Now you can stump your friends with this bit of trivia: "Who registered "National Boss's Day" with the U.S. Chamber of Commerce in 1958? Why, Patricia Bays Haroski, of course! I can't believe you didn't know that!") Patricia, a secretary for the State Farm Insurance Company at the time, selected her employer father's October 16 birthday for this event, so that employees could show their appreciation to their supervisor and build a stronger work relationship. And Hallmark rejoiced!

I've been a keen observer of work relationships for years - even more so after I completed coursework for leadership coaching at GW University, and went through a few years of coaching with an amazing professional. I learned a lot about what it takes to understand people, to motivate them, to respect and value them, and how to change my own thinking and actions to be a better leader. I don't do it perfectly - most of us don't - but I know I've upped my game over the years. I am especially mindful about blending fun, fairness, challenge, education, inspiration, positive reinforcement, constructive feedback, care and compassion when I'm in the "boss seat." I liked it when my team members told me what worked, and what needed to be tweaked for them to perform at the top of their game. I liked knowing that if I did my part right, a little bit of me would be integrated in my team members' leadership skills, and they would pay it forward when they managed someone. And when I have a boss, I try to tell them what I like about their leadership; what makes them effective, and what will help me do my job better.

Even if you missed Boss's Day last week, think about sending yours (past and/or present) a handwritten note, text or email. Tell them what you've learned under their tutelage; or call out a conversation or a moment that made a difference to you. It will underscore what they do well, so that they know it makes a difference and they'll keep doing it. And it will make their day. Guaranteed! Just don't say something like "I love how your vacant blue eyes match your shirt," or "It's nice of you not to yell too loud when you're mad at me." You know what mama said: "If you can't say anything nice...come sit by me." Oops, I mean "... then don't say anything at all."

Go on - write that note! Patricia Bays Haroski will be happy you did.

© 2014 A Bit of Brie/Anitabrie